"Am I Included"

Maybe it’s a girl thing...but, I hate being left out! For me that is about the worst feeling in the world. Well, other than something horrible happening to one of my loved ones. It just seems to me that if you really really want to hurt another female just tell her she is not included. Then of course, list ridiculous reasons why she didn’t get invited. Here are a few: we thought you wouldn’t like that sort of thing, because you are not part of our family, we knew you’d be too busy to join us or there weren't enough seats for one more person. Really?

These are all statements I have heard at some point in my life regarding why I wasn’t included and for years I let this pierce my heart. With shoulders slumped and chin down the unstoppable, dreadful thoughts came crashing in year after year. I am not enough, not pretty enough not cool enough and now I’m rejected from the pack. I’m sure I’m not alone. I’ve seen little girls in action with their secret clubs and manipulations. Those little girls grow up and throw out nasty curve balls to adult women too. Well. Listen up! I don’t want to go to your dumb party anyway!

Ok- you figured me out. I am middle aged and I still get injured from this type of ludicrous thing. It’s almost quite comical. For me, feeling disregarded is a piercing pain that runs deeper than I can’t even express with words. When life and people let me down, it is not easy but it’s time to check my focus! Can I hear an, amen Sista or am I alone in this? When we shift our focus from man to God, a powerful transition happens from pain to freedom.

How do we begin to comprehend the love that God has for us? Surely man’s love pales in comparison. Why oh why do we look to people to fill us up with love or even think they can? Whether it is a single person, group of people, community or society we are all looking for a place to fit in. What I’ve realized is that even if you fit in today, not all goes well all the time. So then, what? What do you do or can you do in those moments when you feel rejected, disregarded and unknown?

God’s love is so much greater than those moments. If only we could understand that when man fails us, God never will. (Deuteronomy 31:8) You are accepted (Romans 5:1) and not only that, you are highly favored (Luke 1:2)! He will fill up the empty places left in your heart when you feel abandoned and replace it with peace and fulfillment. He will satisfy your soul (Psalm 107:9). As a child of God, His Spirit will lead you, receive you and accepted you (Romans 8:14-16).

He does all of this for us and the only reason why is because He loves us! Sometimes when I feel wounded and worthless I hang my heart on John 15:16 (ISV) which says, "You have not chosen me, but I have chosen you. I have appointed you to go and produce fruit that will last, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he will give it to you.” So, there you have it. Not only are we chosen but we have a wonderful purpose in life. We belong to God, our Abba Father.

To begin to understand the depth of God’s love for us is the beginning of freedom. When my focus shifts to God, then I am free from the bondage of feeling worthless and rejected. At that point it doesn’t matter what the mean girls do or say because belonging and being known by God is well with my soul. It’s all I need. Just say’n.


Sheri Page is one of our Refres{her} bloggers. She has been married to her husband for 10 years and cherishes their blended family of 6 adult children and 9 grandchildren. Sheri has worked in and alongside ministries for over 30 years. She has served many roles within the walls of a church including, a Women’s Ministry director and assistant to a Care Pastor where she served people who were walking through Baptism, Celebrate Recovery, Divorce Care and benevolence. Sheri loves to share her curiosity and unique understanding of life with Jesus by her side. She is a 5-year breast cancer survivor and considers that experience to be one of the greatest gifts God has given her. More writings from Sheri can be found on her blog: https://thelordsdwellingplace.com/